Published January 20, 2026
4 min read

How to make friends?

Short Answer

To make friends, be open and approachable, show genuine interest in others, find common interests, be a good listener, initiate contact, be consistent, and invest time in building connections.

Detailed Explanation

Background

Making friends is fundamental to human well-being and happiness. Friendships provide support, companionship, and a sense of belonging that are essential for mental health and life satisfaction. While making friends can feel challenging, especially as adults, understanding how to build friendships helps us create meaningful connections and enrich our lives. Once you make friends, learning How to maintain friendships? helps you keep these relationships strong over time.

Research in psychology shows that friendships develop through shared experiences, mutual interest, and consistent interaction. While some people seem naturally social, friendship-building skills can be learned and developed. By understanding the principles of friendship formation, we can overcome social challenges, build confidence, and create the connections we need for well-being. Building How to build trust? is essential for developing deeper friendships, and developing How to develop empathy? helps you connect more authentically with others.

Scientific Explanation

Making friends involves several key elements:

  1. Approachability: Being open, friendly, and welcoming makes others feel comfortable approaching you.

  2. Genuine interest: Showing authentic interest in others and their experiences creates connection and makes people feel valued.

  3. Common ground: Finding shared interests, values, or experiences provides a foundation for friendship.

  4. Active listening: Being a good listener shows care and helps you understand others, building connection.

  5. Initiative: Taking the first step to reach out, invite, or connect shows interest and helps friendships develop.

  6. Consistency: Regular contact and interaction build familiarity and trust that deepen friendships.

  7. Vulnerability: Sharing appropriately about yourself creates intimacy and encourages others to open up.

  8. Time investment: Friendships require time and effort to develop and maintain.

Real Examples

  • Someone makes friends by joining a club or group related to their interests, providing opportunities to meet like-minded people.

  • A person builds friendships by being a good listener, showing genuine interest in others' stories and experiences.

  • Someone makes friends by initiating contact, inviting people to coffee or activities, and following up consistently.

  • A person develops friendships by being open and sharing appropriately about themselves, creating mutual vulnerability.

  • Someone builds friendships by being reliable and consistent, showing up when they say they will and maintaining regular contact.

Practical Application

How to Apply

To make friends:

  1. Be approachable: Smile, make eye contact, and show openness to interaction through your body language.

  2. Show genuine interest: Ask questions about others, listen actively, and remember details about their lives.

  3. Find common interests: Join groups, clubs, or activities related to your interests to meet like-minded people.

  4. Be a good listener: Focus on understanding others rather than just waiting for your turn to speak.

  5. Take initiative: Reach out first, invite people to activities, and don't wait for others to make the first move.

  6. Be consistent: Maintain regular contact and follow through on plans to build trust and familiarity.

  7. Share appropriately: Open up about yourself gradually, creating mutual vulnerability that deepens connection.

  8. Be patient: Friendships take time to develop, so be patient and consistent in your efforts.

  9. Accept rejection: Not everyone will become a friend, and that's okay—focus on connections that develop naturally.

  10. Invest time: Make time for friendships, prioritizing relationships that matter to you.

How to Understand Others

When others are making friends:

  • Their friendship-building approach may differ, and understanding various strategies helps you support their efforts.

  • People make friends at different rates and in different ways, so be patient and supportive.

  • Recognizing that making friends can be challenging helps you provide encouragement and understanding.

  • Understanding that friendships develop gradually helps you support others' process without pressure.